воскресенье, 24 мая 2009 г.

The new fairytale

The new version og The Beauty and the Beast
***
- What presents do you want me to bring you, my dearest daughters?
- Bring me a french curve! - says the eldest daughter
- A french cuffs? With laces?
- No, no, a friench curve, to draw ovals, and a logarithmic slide rule
- How many centimetres should it be?
- It does not matter. Will you remember it?

- Of course I will. What about you, my middle daughter?
- Bring me a tester, please.
- To make toasts?
- No father, not a toastes, tester. It is a measuring device. With wires, clamps, and up to 1 kiloohm. And do not take the electronic one, I'me used to an old style one.

- Oh, - said the father, - and what do you want my youngerst daughter?
- I want a continuous milling machine, and also an electrical fretsaw, circ saw, Bosch perforating machine and a small welding set. And do not bother about welding electrodes, I'll pinch it from a nearest construction site

- No way! - grew sad father. - You are women!!! You are to be marrried soon! Nuts to you, not a electrical fretsaw! Lipstick for you, lipstick for you, and as of you, my youngest daughter, lipstick, nail varnish and a year subscription to Cosmopolitan. And while I'm away you all should practice in cross-stitch!

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